Once Again... Part I - writing



  • With the recent finishing of the 'Once Again...' topic, (the first team story) we have decided to continue it in part II. However, I am interested in writing up part I, in two ways: one version with inconsistencies, arguments, notes, etc. and another nice, clean, and seemingly written by one person.

    If you have any suggestions or want to help, please reply.

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)



  • Okay, with all the sigs and notes, 'Once Again...' weighs in at 41 pages, at size 12 helvetica. Without sigs, notes, etc. I'd estimate about 30 pages of story. Again, I'm going to need a good deal of help with this, so please reply! ;)

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)



  • I finished getting rid of sigs and comments, and it is now only 30 pages (size 12 Times New Roman). I still have to straighten out the points of view, any suggestions on what type I should use?

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)



  • Use a narrator's point of view, forget first person. (I have transferred webboard to apps before.....it always has surprised me ;) )

    ------------------
    And so the problem remained; lots of people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the ones with digital watches. Many were increasingly of the opinion that they had all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that the trees had been a bad move and that no one should ever have left the oceans. - Douglass Adams



  • Hmmm, maybe you should help me, theKestrel. I used third-person, (narrator) but left your posts first-person. I've gotten a lot of it HTML-ized, so maybe you could go through it and make the changes? ;)

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)



  • Sure, no problem. Oh, and you guys don't have to call me "theKestrel". ;) You can call me Kestrel, etc. :)

    ------------------
    And so the problem remained; lots of people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the ones with digital watches. Many were increasingly of the opinion that they had all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that the trees had been a bad move and that no one should ever have left the oceans. - Douglass Adams



  • Quote

    Originally posted by Talos:
    **I finished getting rid of sigs and comments, and it is now only 30 pages (size 12 Times New Roman). I still have to straighten out the points of view, any suggestions on what type I should use?
    **

    Sorry about my brief absence. I personally like 12 point Palatino font, but that's me.

    ------------------



  • Quote

    Originally posted by Avatara:
    **Sorry about my brief absence. I personally like 12 point Palatino font, but that's me.

    **

    Well, if you want to see it, you won't need to even check your email. It's not done yet, but if you want to see what's up, here's the URL:

    (url="http://"http://users.erols.com/alkrauss/Once_Again.html")http://users.erols.c...Once_Again.html(/url)

    I need pictures for people, I sent you an email about that, Avatara. Also, I could use help editing the 'edited' version. Feel free to email me if you have suggestions! (the email is at the bottom of almost every page on the site).

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)



  • I fixed the title.

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)



  • Its okay...but I don't see why we need the "origonal" version. I mean, you could have the link take them straight to the story. I have gone through and fixed some inconsistancies (before I closed the topic, so you got lucky) and made it fit a little nicer...the first page anyway. (talking about the webboard topic)

    ------------------



  • Oh, forgot to mention. I will start Part II as soon as two things happen:

    1. Sundered Angel gets back to me to tell me if he wants to be in.

    2. Laguna and Sargatanus post their characters in 'Character Info'. I have Laguna's promise that his will be up within 24 hours.

    In other words, it should be ready soon. This plot is much more flexible, with some room for side plots, and I don't intend on planning it out. The ending should be a surprise to everyone. I should request that everyone stay away from the southwest corner of the island though.

    ------------------



  • I did the 'original' version because I thought spell-checking the story should do some good, and if the Ambrosias server is down, it will still be up. However, I made some mistakes in the 'original' version, and fixing them will be a pain. If you think I should just make that a link, or maybe offer a link, I'll do that.

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)
    (url="http://"http://users.erols.com/alkrauss/Once_Again.html")Once Again: on the web.(/url)



  • Avatara: in the interest of keeping the story real, I nominate JackFrost to be killed in some way. Mind you, this is only if I can get one of my other characters in the action, preferably Eldargon (he hasn't been gettint enough action lately). I don't know, just sneak him in after a while.

    Hay, maybe someone should make a "Honorable Heros" thread, I don't know, but something permanent. Just a thought. It would incurage people to let their characters pass when the time has come :frown:

    ;)

    ------------------
    The One And Only:
    ~Theo Nean Donly~

    (This message has been edited by Theo Nean Donly (edited 11-06-2000).)



  • Quote

    Originally posted by Talos:
    **I did the 'original' version because I thought spell-checking the story should do some good, and if the Ambrosias server is down, it will still be up. However, I made some mistakes in the 'original' version, and fixing them will be a pain. If you think I should just make that a link, or maybe offer a link, I'll do that.

    **

    I agree with Talos about the original version. It is nice to have a hard copy, and not have to be online to read it. Also would be nice to have all the spelling errors, etc. fixed. Another thing is the way he is changing the text. So yeah, I would like to see an original version with it. BTW Talos, let me say again how good of a job you have done with the edited version. :)

    ------------------
    And so the problem remained; lots of people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the ones with digital watches. Many were increasingly of the opinion that they had all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that the trees had been a bad move and that no one should ever have left the oceans. - Douglass Adams



  • (quote)Originally posted by theKestrel:
    **I agree with Talos about the original version. It is nice to have a hard copy, and not have to be online to read it. Also would be nice to have all the spelling errors, etc. fixed. Another thing is the way he is changing the text. So yeah, I would like to see an original version with it. BTW Talos, let me say again how good of a job you have done with the edited version.:) )

    Also, I'm going to add more stuff to the pages.

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)
    (url="http://"http://users.erols.com/alkrauss/Once_Again.html")Once Again: on the web.(/url)
    **



  • Actually, I just read your edited version, and I think you did a really good job. The one suggestion I have to make, though, is that you turn it completely into a third person piece (ie. don't use 'I' or 'you' at all), what's that called, Omnesiciant or something? Other than that, I shudder to think of the work you did to revise it. Once again, very nice. c^= (supposed to be a thums-up, but I haven't gotten it down quite yet) :)

    Oh, and another idea: I don't know how hard it would be to do, but under 'List of Participants' could you create a link that woudld include the character descriptions? But maybe this is pointless if no one but us reads it, in which case we allready know them. And I would kinda rather you didn't put "Theo Nean Donly" down an individual character. JackFrost(Theo Nean Donly) is fine, but since Theo isn't the name of any actual character in it, I think it is slightly misleading.

    ------------------
    The One And Only:
    ~Theo Nean Donly~

    (This message has been edited by Theo Nean Donly (edited 11-06-2000).)



  • Thanks to yet another untimely hard drive crash, I lost the original DreamWeaver files. Fortunately, I rebuilt it using as much of the original as possible, and am fixing some base problems. There should be a major update to the site soon.

    Theo Nean Donly: I like your idea for the character descriptions, but I wouldn't know how to make it scroll to a certain point on the Ambrosia page. What I'll do is copy character info from the Ambrosia page, but provide a link to the original topic.

    To everyone in the "Participants" area: Like I did, you can put a picture of your character/yourself up. I used an old Egypto-Roman mummy portrait of a priest, because I think it represents my character well. You can use pretty much anything you want. Just email me with the picture. (My email is on the site.)

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)
    (url="http://"http://users.erols.com/alkrauss/Once_Again.html")Once Again: on the web.(/url)



  • Quote

    Originally posted by Talos:
    **Thanks to yet another untimely hard drive crash, I lost the original DreamWeaver files. Fortunately, I rebuilt it using as much of the original as possible, and am fixing some base problems. There should be a major update to the site soon.
    **

    Simple solution: backup.

    Quote

    Originally posted by Talos:
    **Theo Nean Donly: I like your idea for the character descriptions, but I wouldn't know how to make it scroll to a certain point on the Ambrosia page. What I'll do is copy character info from the Ambrosia page, but provide a link to the original topic.
    **

    Well, look at the url at the top when you click on the name of the last person that posted in a topic. You would do his suggustion with the same idea.

    ------------------

    (This message has been edited by Avatara (edited 11-06-2000).)



  • Quote

    Originally posted by Avatara:
    **Oh, forgot to mention. I will start Part II as soon as two things happen:

    1. Sundered Angel gets back to me to tell me if he wants to be in.

    2. Laguna and Sargatanus post their characters in 'Character Info'. I have Laguna's promise that his will be up within 24 hours.
    **

    Well, Laguna has his character up. I'm trying to get ahold of Sargatanus and/or Sundered Angel.

    ------------------



  • OK, I'm gonna' call it a night. I just have one question: should the picture-buttons act more like buttons? Should they change when you roll and/or click on them?

    ------------------
    <font color="gold">Bronze: the other gold metal.</font>
    (url="http://"http://www.ambrosiasw.com/cgi-bin/vftp/show.pl?product=evo&category;=guides&display;=date&file;=ChroniclesByJake101.sit.hqx")Chronicles by Jake101: the unposted chapters.(/url)
    (url="http://"http://users.erols.com/alkrauss/Once_Again.html")Once Again: on the web.(/url)


Log in to reply